Tired of trying to read The King James Version and not understanding the foreign and dead language of its text? Fret no more for we will be teaching a class on ancient cuneiform so you can finally read the Bible of the English Reformation with understanding.
After taking the course you will be able to limp your way through the following ancient writ…
And when even was now come, his disciples went down unto the sea, and entered into a ship, and went over the sea toward Capernaum. And it was now dark, and Jesus was not come to them. And the sea arose by reason of a great wind that blew. So when they had rowed about five and twenty or thirty furlongs, they see Jesus walking on the sea, and drawing nigh unto the ship: and they were afraid. But he saith unto them, It is I; be not afraid. Then they willingly received him into the ship: and immediately the ship was at the land whither they went.
—John 6:16-21
I know that seems pretty intimidating, after all it’s in “ye olde English” which is practically cuneiform. However, once we teach you this dead language you will be able to limp your way through it and pretty much understand it.
#satire #learntoreadfolks
